i’m not in a good mood. i don’t particularly like my job and i had a big smile on my face half way through our second pdm (professional development meeting) this week simply by thinking about getting up, saying “thanks, but no thanks” and walking out the door and never coming back. i’m laughing about it now in fact.
teaching isn’t what i thought it would be.
it’s my own fault really. i took a job at a school which is ‘struggling’ to put it mildly. but in my defence it was so late in the day i would have taken a job teaching children out of peter mandelson’s a-hole. i didn’t seriously consider the commitment they want/expect me to put in. there is a fuckload to do. more than anything i’ve had to do so far. i realise that a few weeks into teaching i wrote a similar post, so obviously i’m not really going to quit – but that doesn’t bring a smile to my face i’ll tell you that. it makes me type this, avoid work and look forward to finishing another book tonight (by getting into bed at 8pm).
i have some funny stories about the idiocy in my class but it’s all overwhelmed by the level of work i have to do. or to put it another way, the level of work they want me to do. i’m quite happy not to do it. okay one story. there are about 5 children (or chn as teachers write when they plan) in my class who can’t do their 2x tables. one particularly stupid, but likeable girl put as the answer to 1 x 2. 3. it got worse after the first question. 10 x 2? 13.
you see, i’ve boarded a ship carrying a bunch of fucking retards. the other teachers are excellent professionals and determined to change the school, but to be honest – i don’t really give a fuck. i wanted my first job to be a fairly easy post where i learnt the basics, not be completely swamped by priorities and under achieving children. our last sats results were bad and every year group has to get at least 2 sublevels progress this year which is education-speak for improve a lot. that means 1 x 2 = 3 girl has to be able to do division by july. of course i want my class to learn, but through fun activities and exploration. not through pressure and assessment. and fuck there is a lot of assessment. and fuck there is a lot of pressure.
to highlight the sinkingness of our ship. guess what percentage of year 5 children are on track to meet national levels this year? 11%. i think my year is doing best with 63%.
anyway, i’d love to stay and chat, but i’ve got a load of work to do before tomorrow morning.
oh and i did have fish fingers. and they sucked.