the dmz

the dmz

its the second day of the second week and reader – i’m on a sick day. don’t jump to conclusions, you could probably walk but i think we could meet half way. i actually do feel ill and i shouldn’t have gone in yesterday because i felt worse, but today was a day of recovery, rather than play. admittedly i did watch indiana jones this morning but i was drinking beechams under the duvet in all my clothes. then i slept for six hours.

that said – i’m not so sure i like this teaching thing.

i know, i know. i’ve put in some effort, admittedly not a lot but at the moment its not filling me with the passion and joy that i thought i would feel. this does not mean this has become a letter of resignation – far from it. i’m sort of half determined to at least see this thing through till xmas. if only to make sure i don’t put a smile on the faces of those naysayers.

some background. the first week was good. i taught every day and also took groups when we did numeracy (maths) literacy (english) and a few other things. the class is good, i like the school, i don’t even mind the drive.

monday was good, my first lesson, which also meant my first lesson plan (lp). for those of you have never had to do a LP in a proforma, its a pain in the ass. learning objectives, prior knowlege, success criteria, outcomes (for some, most, all), key questions, key vocabulary, inclusion needs, ict links, resources for lessons, lsa roles. and then we get to the timings – 10min intro, 15min lead in, 25min main, 10min plenary (can be changed slightly) and finally assessment – for every one hour lesson you teach. i understand the need to do it, its making us think of all the things we’ll need to include for lessons, make us conscious of the different aspects of learning (visual, auditory, kinaesthetic) blah etc.

the first lesson i did was, of course, about the great fire of london (gfol). it went well, i felt the children learned a lot, loved the flash animation i showed on the iwb and the other student said it was good. so i was on a high, went to speak to my teacher who asked what i was doing for tomorrows lesson. “what the fuck are you talking about?” i thought to myself. “oh…tomorrow’s lesson? i thought i was teaching this one and -” “i thought i told you before half term you’d be teaching the whole topic” “oh, know y’see that’s where you’re trying to bullshit me, my memory is bad but its not that bad” i thought. after some discussion i said i must have misunderstood her.

for the rest of last week it was a bit of a nightmare. come home, spend two hours planning a new aspect of the gfol to teach, which meant spending two hours online trying to find other peoples shit to use, eat, an hour to write the lp, email across to my mentor. get reply, try to incorporate her comments (where i felt i could do it without rewriting the whole thing) into school the next day, take groups for literacy, numeracy, get to know the kids a bit, involve myself as much as possible, eat lunch and prepare, teach my lesson, write my evaluation, get feedback. repeat. my learning objectives:

can I learn the story of the great fire of london?

can I understand what it might have been like in london during the great fire? (this was looking at drawings/painting from the time on the iwb – a speaking/listening lesson)

can I learn by acting what it might have been like to have been in the great fire of london? (drama – those of you who know me know what i think about drama. so you can imagine the fun i had teaching a lesson where the children had to act out being tired, hot, dragging belongings etc, by demonstration. but i do like ordering kids about so it wasn’t all bad and some of it was quite funny.)

can I understand how we know what happened in the great fire of london? (writing – diary entries like samuel pepys)

can I design and clearly cut out a silhouette of a house to help create a class display about the great fire of london? (art – this was a good friday afternoon lesson but you can’t just do “friday make a display lesson and have fun”, you have to have learning objectives, success criteria, so it took ages to plan)

hence no posts last week.

there are some great personalities in the class and i have have fun everyday but its been noted and i’d agree, i don’t have the ‘presence’ of a teacher yet. i struggle with infants – you have to be really animated, raising/lowering the pitch of your voice a lot, smiling all the time and generally be upbeat. hmmm. you can see my dilemma. must try harder is my motto for the week (yes, taking into account the sick day, i know). plus i have to work on my behaviour management, getting a bunch of 6yr olds who don’t know anything (seriously, these kids know nothing; how to tie shoes, what division is, how to write a sentence within the lines of a page etc) to do shit is harder than you’d imagine. i thought just looking mean, being waaaay taller and telling them what to do would work, but no. its more like “well done amy, she’s showing me she’s ready to learn” so others will try and do the same, there’s a bunch of tactics i need more practice at. i kept get told “they’re going to eat you alive” at my next inner city school, which is nice to hear.

another aspect i wasn’t prepared for was the…shall we say – inappropriateness. i’m the only male teacher in the school. one kid came up to me last week and said “mr scutt. i just went to the toilet and there’s a yellow thingy on my willy and it won’t come off”. another kid punched me in the cock, all the kids want a hug but because of my height it means their head level is about my groin level so i have to sort of push them away gently and they get upset,  when i sit down to talk to them and they’re in a circle all the girls sit in positions that would make paris hilton blush, and whenever they do pe/gym they all get changed in the class so i stand staring at the wall with my back turned. plus i’m pretty sure every single parent thinks that i’m a paedo, other than the couple who seem to want to bang me who turn up with a pram, baby puke covered pajamas on and look like they’ve just spent a night in gitmo and tell me all about how their kid loves the gfol.

i’ve already written about the fun weekend i had thanks to the kids when i should have been planning my numeracy lessons for this week. so i failed yesterday and got an “unsatisfactory” review but was given a slide because of ‘my condition’. i planned my lessons for today but this morning i felt recovery would be better than another fuckup.

there’s more i could write about, like the other side to doing the course. i realised today that i should have been tracking eight children, keeping scores of all there lessons, writing evaluations, basically a ton of paperwork which is incredibly tedious, all to be written by hand. i don’t mind the paperwork, but its so repetitive it becomes a chore, rather than a useful series of documents to track a child’s progress if that makes sense.

i’m going back in tomorrow and i think we’ve got pe which i’m team teaching with my teacher. y’see i should have been led gently into teaching, like every other person on my course and what my teacher wanted – but my mentor, in all her wisdom decided that i needed to jump straight in in preparation for the inner city school so i’ve been busting my ass while the rest of my class have taught maybe three lessons, i’m on six. i should also get 20% of lesson time a week to do my own shit, write reports etc, but again, nope. so we had a meeting yesterday after my lesson for two hours (which i secretly recorded, because i knew i wouldn’t remember what she said, i’ll probably keep doing it and post parts eventually) and let her know i needed more time etc. i don’t think it worked because she seemed to pay little attention.

anyway. the juno soundtrack just finished so its been about 45mins writing time for mr scutt and he has to go and make a chicken casserole to eat for the rest of the week.


One response to “teach.

  1. Pingback: teach. « no.plan.

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